Recently a news item crossed our path and piqued our curiosity. It seems a little blunder by cleaning staff triggered an emergency slide of a Cathay Pacific B777 to inflate, delaying 277 travellers bound for Chicago recently.
The aircraft was parked at the terminal building at Hong Kong International Airport undergoing servicing by ground crew and cleaning staff. As a result of the incident the aircraft was immediately taken out of service for inspection — a normal procedure following deployment of a slide — and passengers were forced to wait for a replacement aircraft.
The official comment from the airline was as follows: “We suspect that there was a procedural error by a staff member from our cleaning services provider. It had nothing to do with any technical issues,” an airline spokeswoman said, apologising for the inconvenience.
So that of course got the Belly Achers thinking, what sort of “procedural error” would be required to cause an emergency slide on the widebody B777 to deploy? After some in-depth probing we’re now experts on the operation of emergency evacuation slides!
The short of the story is: It’s not a simple issue to ‘accidentally’ deploy an evacuation slide. We will spare you the long version, but in essence there is a multiple step process to remove safety pins, arm the door and finally open the door which actually triggers the deployment of the slide.
So after all this we sat down and cracked our heads to decide just what Belly Ache spin we were going to apply and then it occurred to us that it has been ages since we did a Top 10, in fact we reckon its been 2-3 years since we played that game! So without further ado…
Top 10 Slide Excuses
10. “How else was I supposed to get off the plane?”
9. “Hey, I just wanted to make sure these things actually work before I fly next time.”
8. [insert ‘Wheeeee!’ sound here] “Oh come on what’s wrong with a little fun, my inner child just needed a slide!”
7. “Ayah, always cooped up cleaning inside this metal tube, how about we open the door for some fresh air?
6. “Procedures, procedures… you want me to clean the darn plane or read the manual all day?”
5. “Armed and cross check! In the unlikely event of an emergency exits are located left and right… Sorry I’ve always wanted to be a flight attendant.”
4. [cue Brittany Spears music] Opps I did it again!
3. Ah-shum, cheong hao hou wu chou, fai d mat cho koi … Translation from Cantonese (one cleaning auntie speaking to another): “Hey Ah-shum, outside of the window very dirty, going to clean it…”
2. “Oh look, its one of those cute ‘Remove Before Flight’ tags, my daughter will love this to hang on her school bag!” And the number one excuse for the accidental slide deployment… [cue drum roll]
1. “Ah-je; Wah, yau goh lou-fu-gei beng, lai lai koi, fat dat lah. Ng sai chou lah! Translation from Cantonese: “Oh look Ah-je; a giant slot machine handle, I pull handle get rich, no need to work in cheap-skate job!”
